Five Guys and a Sheriff

So Five Guys is a burger place, real good burgers, around my way. They give you free peanuts while you wait for your food. They are a free for all. They place a bucket, on top of unopened bags of peanuts, and fill it up. Well, I'm waiting for my food and up comes a Sheriff. A big one. I'm getting my food to go and wait, sitting, on the bags of peanuts. He orders his after to me and gets a table ready. He decides he wants some peanuts and comes over to where I'm at. I'm sitting right next to the bucket..that's now empty from other other customers. He looks inside the bucket to get some peanuts and we both see there are none there. I crack a joke and say, "They ate them all!'' referring to the customers all around here. He then says, "I didn't fucking eat them all!'' very angered and straight up sizes me up. I'm now confused. As he opens a new bag of peanuts for himself I think what just happen..and it hit me. The Sheriff must have only heard " Ate them all!'' and thinks I was just referring to him. Shit.

Tip of the day, don't say shit to cops. Even if it's something nice.


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