I use to write a lot more to you guys, I think it was mutual and just as beneficial for both of us to talk about what goes on in our lives. I've never been that type of artist to brush off any of my fans, I've chopped it up with a lot of you over the years and even though most of you are strangers, we do share some sort of a weird bond. Life is at all time ''wtf'' moment right now for me. It is so hard sometimes to find inspiration at times. It really trips me out when I hear that I inspire some of you. That is the greatest feeling in the world and the most rewarding being an artist I can ponder. You can be the dopest, the flashiest, the most popular, but if your not helping people feel good about themselves and get through the day with some confidence, what are you making music for, really? I've kind of lost that these past years. And I'm going to get it back. The passion. The stuff that's suppose to reflect on to you, then bounces off you to the next person, and so forth. I have no idea what I'm doing at this moment except that I'm going to be making another record. This time I'm going to be having some people behind me that really believe in this. A new label. A new deal. Another opportunity to do it right.
These people are taking a risk with me. Not just financially. It's way more serious than that. What do I have to lose? It scares the shit out of me, but I'm going to do it one last time before I self destruct. And I'm going to do it right this time for you. Whoever is left. Whoever has been here the whole time or whoever just stepped aboard. This one will be for you. For us. Because I need to make another record that doesn't just get me props or a shock value award. It's got to be way bigger than that, it's got to be way deeper. I'm not trying to be emo here, not trying to build some stupid generic hype. This is real. This isn't going to a publicist or an email blast. This is between me and you. Times right now are the craziest they have ever been for my friends, family, and myself. We are all going through some real serious shit and we're all just trying to keep it from becoming unglued. Keep it together. I keep things very private and hidden. I think I do it very well, but it's been eating it's way out of me. I want to give you the best record I can before I lose it. Gees, this must sound so stupid to you.
Sometimes I have no idea who I am or where I'm going. It'll happen like once a year and I'll submerge into old photos and songs I've recorded. I hate doing it but it shows me where I've come from, how far I've come, and still how long I've got to go. I did that today. I want to share a song (isn't that what the internet has been perfected for?) with you I recorded about 6 or so years ago. I played a very rough show at this place called "Hot Dogs" and went directly home after, wrote and recorded it with a hoarse voice. This same show embarks rapper Souleye's debut for myself ,who is now married to Alanis Morrisette, and most likely has a $1,000,000 in the bank. This is around the time cats were just putting me down. I found a home with other aspiring artists, who are now some of my best friends and helped me figure out what I should and shouldn't be doing . There are some samples spliced in from even OLDER songs in here from when I just a young man, 16 or so, staying up all night teaching myself how to rap on beat in my room from a suburb of Dallas. I'm not giving up yet, just hang in there a little longer with me. I wish you all much success and happiness. We are all priceless. Never settle for nothing less than your worth.
TNM.
P.S. Hope to see all the locals this Saturday with Toki Wright and Grieves at Propaganda. Take care.
"Hold Me Down"
http://www.divshare.com/do..wnload/11805361-99b
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